im gonna marry thor
but theyre making thor a woman now
im gonna marry thor
"what are your plans for the future" *shrugs so hard that my arms detach at the shoulders and i am no longer asked any questions that arent about my missing limbs*
i have zero patience for these things:
- slow internet
- 14 year olds who think theyre edgy bc they smoke weed on weekends
- screaming babies
AW SHIT SON
In a randomized double-blind study female students were less likely to be hired because they were viewed as less competent. And if your name gives you away, you could be in trouble, too. People with hard to pronounce names are less likely to get hired.
Are you fucking kidding me? Like, no, Shakespeare wouldn’t tweet a sonnet cause 140 characters is a bit short for that. Wrong medium. But you know what he would have? A very active twitter FULL OF DICK PUNS AND YOUR MOM JOKES okay. (And probably also a blog for the sonnets and longer works, that cross-posts links to twitter anyway.)
Get out of here with that pretentious anti-technology bullshit.
He’d rock the fuck out of memes. Don’t deny it.
Exit, pursued by a doge.
much run wow
There’s this asshole who every time he sees me with my ukulele he thinks he’s funny and asks “Can you play any Metallica?” but the joke is now on him because I just learned how to play the intro riff to Master of Puppets.
I did it. I fucking did it. He asked me again just like I knew he would and I stared him straight in the eyes without blinking and just fucking shredded on my ukulele
I IMAGINED THAT GIF EXACTLY
- spanish and italian: So THESE words are feminine and THESE words are masculine, and you ALWAYS put an adjective AFTER the noun.
- french: haha i dont fuckin know man just do whatever
- german: LET'S ADD A NEUTRAL NOUN HAHA
- english: James, while John had had "had", had had "had had"; "had had" had had a better effect on the teacher.
- gaelic: the pronounciation changes depending on the gender and what letter the word starts and ends with and hahah i dont even know good fucking luck
- polish: here have all of these consonants have fun
- japanese: subject article noun article verb. too bad there's three fucking alphabets lmao hope your first language isn't western
- welsh: sneeze, and chances are you've got it right. idfk
- chinese: here's a picture. draw it. it means something. it can be pronounced four different ways. these twenty other pictures are pronounced the same but have very different meanings. godspeed.
- arabic: so here's this one word. it actually translates to three words. also pronouns don't really exist. the gender is all in the verb. have fun!
- latin: here memorize 500 charts and then you still dont know what the fuck is happening
- sign language: If you move this sign by a tenth of an inch, you'll be signing "penis"
- russian: idk man its pronounced like its spelt but good fucking luck spelling it
- Greek: so basically we're going to add 15 syllables to every word you know and assign it one of 3 genders at random. Also good luck figuring out where to put the accents you piece of shit
You would think that teenagers would be the rudest customers when really it’s mostly old, middle-aged people.
Teens always look terrified as customers.